069. memories

let's see. elementary.. well, as i already said, when i was younger, i mostly hung out with my brother's friends. i had a good friend in preschool.. rumi naruse. and.. a girl named ariel? and tara? i don't quite remember. i just remember.. ariel (red headed girl) having a birthday party and we made those big floppy hats (tea party hats?) and we were waiting to see if the preschool teacher would show up but she didn't. i don't really remember much else about preschool. apparently i knew japanese better than i knew english (my mom's mom was over lots to take care of me). i remember playing card games with her in the living room. i think i remember locking her out of the house once when she was in the backyard.. i don't remember her reaction but my mom said she got pretty upset. i was apparently her favorite though. i loved her alot. she passed away when i was pretty young.. and i cried for days. oh, and i found a paper that said that english was my second language. i translated for my dad lots.. he couldn't speak japanese and my grandma couldn't really speak english (if at all). my dad said i translated better than my brother did. but when she passed, i forgot japanese.

kindergarten.. i met bryn kirkpatrick. i was basically attached to her hip. there were other friends.. christina rakowski.. cara something or other.. and a charlie girl. i remember charlie's birthday party, we all got beach towels with the different disney characters on them :) haha i got beauty and the beast. um.. i remember a birthday party at my house.. and people wanting to sit next to me.. and i remember being happy about that. not ecstatically happy, but just feeling important. i don't remember if that was kindergarten or just early elementary. i think.. also.. there was this guy scott almond (you guys might know him) and we had a beach day or something, 100 days? i don't remember. and he changed in the middle of the room by the cubbies, hahaha. teacher got kind of mad. i didn't see anything. nap time, i didn't really sleep. and i remember another instance where i had to pee really bad but i didn't want to ask because the teacher was reading a story but i kept bumping knees with someone (i think it might've been bryn) so she raised her hand and asked for me. hahaha. man. yea, i was a pretty shy kid. apparently i called bryn all the time but i don't remember that. but i do know that we spent a lot of time together and that i was her shadow, basically. she got along with people really well, made friends with guys easily and a bunch of guys liked her too. outgoing fun type. as for me.. i was still in my tom boy phase.. so i wore one pair of shorts like.. every day. they had flowers on them at the bottom, hahah. and jordan weisenbach asked me if they were the same shorts. i don't remember what i said. but.. yea. i had a big crush (well.. not really. but people kept asking me who i liked and they wouldn't take "nobody" for an answer.. so i said mark santos because he was a pretty popular guy to like. i mean.. lots of girls liked him). he was kind of cute. oh, then i met sydney hockensmith back then too.. and kristin mclaughlin (i remember going over to her house but it was sort of boring and she wanted to play something but i wanted to read.. or something.. i don't remember). i was also pretty out of shape.. we had to run a mile in PE and it took me forever. oh! and.. man. hahah, so many memories. i remember barbara jackson and kindra wilson and other people.. and we had a "club" in third grade (big time to have "clubs"). and apparently bryn had another one so we got into an argument.. and i went to go out hang out with her more so i basically abandoned kindra/barbara/etc. and i apparently met amanda selnick when i was in fourth but i don't remember.. lots of other memories but.. in time, haha. yes, me and shins. i think i said that already.

middle school.. i met and started disliking matt mccamon. i met nikki hosang in the bathroom in sixth grade. she was afraid of me apparently.. i was big.. tall.. yea. i used to tug on people's backpacks alot and jerk them backwards. so i started hanging out with her alot and bryn didn't like that. so bryn went and made new friends.. basically about the time we split. then in seventh i met kaitlin pascual, marynol peyton, jill kang.. and eventually kimiko phan. and we hung out, too, that was fun. and i met joyce hsu (again.. she was in my elem class or something, pretty early on, but she moved to fairmont for a couple years) and we hung out. in eighth.. we made our "aSiAn LaYdEeHz" crew..

HAHAHAHHAHAHAHHAHAHAH.

yea.

then we got into pretty big drama about that 'cause apparently we copied someone else's name and kimi backed out and blahblah and i was pretty proud back then so i got pissed at her and other things happened (splitting away from kimi).. i think i posted about this but.. yea. if i need to again, remind me. um.. as for guys.. i met jin ahn for REAL in seventh, in math class. apparently he had a crush on me since he met me (sometime in fifth?). no idea. and i met shaan mehta in seventh too, in math class. i met paul modracee sometime in 6th.. eric saidi.. cindy parks.. michelle murphy.. used to talk to amanda pickel alot but i didn't really like her. OHH. i had the HUGEST (real) crush on mike pham back then.. ahaha. i think he was my first hug. you know what i mean. hugging the guy you like. i think he went on to have a crush on kimiko phan.. and i think i told mike that i liked him but he didn't like me so.. we were running in PE and zach agrums told me to go away and leave mike alone. hahahha. man i did not like that guy for a long time after that. anyway.. and.. hm. i also used to draw alot. um.. i wore a pink shirt/skort (shirt/short) for the first time in sixth but after that, i dropped the pink.. got a pair of jeans that got super tight after i got them washed, i remember feeling uncomfortable. but other than that, i really liked them. i think i started my period in sixth grade or something, we had a health class and they were talking about it and bryn nudged me, haha. i also remember in that sex class (not quite) that the speaker volunteered me and i got super pissed about that. SUPER pissed. i don't really remember why. anyway.. yea. oh and eighth grade promotion, i remember kimi getting pissed that i got people to dance (i think i got marynol to dance) and.. blahblah, drama. oh and i had my first slow dance with mike pham :) hahaha man that was fun. oh and eighth grade.. was the time where i had my series of 2 or 3 day boyfriends. john yukio reyes.. jin ahn.. and adam lam.

HAHAHAHAHAHHAHHAHAHAHAH.

yea.

if you need more info about that stuff, ask. if you REALLY REALLY want it. ONLY if you really really want it. like, really really really really really want it. hahahha. anyway.. yea. i think that about sums up middle school. OH. no way. that's when i went through my depression. after liking that stupid scott tomono guy (had a crush on him for a couple years) which i never really got over until junior year-ish. i went through this "emo poem" phase. i'm pretty sure i could find them if you wanted to get depressed after reading some stuff. hahahha. anyway.. yea. i did try cutting myself.. with a design that i made.. HAHAHAHAHA. it combined S + T + 1 + 4 + 3 (143 = i love you) in the same symbol. but i couldn't get myself to actually cut deep enough to scar. good thing. anyway. yea.. that was pretty stupid. i look back and laugh. but i really did like the guy. i'm sure that' s an entire nother entry if you wanted to know about all of that stuff. maybe i'll update about it anyways. SUCKAHS! :P

high school.. i entered with kimi spreading hate messages about me to all the people she met. people i met at the beginning turned to not talking to me because of things kimi said. i met stacy hata in honors geo but i dropped out second semester 'cause i just didn't care (not after ogen in 6th grade). eventually people came around and i started hanging out with people again. but the first few months of freshman year pretty much sucked. i remember the first day, i got onto campus and just hated life. i was probably also still depressed, which didn't help. but you know. ahaha. i purposely didn't wear glasses because i just didn't care. i wore them when i had to but other than that, walking around, i didn't wear them. kimi got pissed because she thought i was "mad dogging her" but i was just really tired all the time (thanks, depression!). i also remember it was either freshman or sophomore year (around the time jacob kwoc? got to EHS) that i got threatened that if i went to oktoberfest, that i would get stabbed (jacob actually warned me) 'cause it was sylvia and her friends or something were going to be there, etc. i ended up not going--not out of fear, but i was just so tired of it. i also had a huge crush on matt sung. :X japanese class with bethany, cuzz and nikki.. that was fun.

sophomore year.. i think i dated jin twice. then at the end of soph year, he stopped talking to me.. and.. i found out he was dating STACY NGUYEN hahahahahhahaa :) and i got sort of pissed. but. yea. secretly, i was making fun of them 'cause she was always pulling him forwards when they walked, it seemed like. anyway. yea. i think we patched it up in soph year too, after they broke up. just to be mean (and i mean, MEAN) i asked him about if they had kissed at WF and he said yes and i think i laughed at him. or something. i don't know. i was pissed that he stopped talking to me though. i don't remember if he made me a promise before or after this, but he said that he would always be my friend because i would need one down the road and he promised to be there for me always. i'm thinking he made that promise before the not-talking because that would've made me more bitter about him not talking to me, leading to laughing at him.. yea. i'm a bitch when i'm pissed off. :P oh and i think i started talking to james king at the end of soph year. he asked me to prom at the end of soph year.. i was walking outside of chem i think (or it was near there, AP chem) and he did that cheesy (lean up against the wall and trap me there) with a pink rose and asked me to prom. i said no. i forgot how though. oh, and mid year i got pissed at nikki hosang 'cause she said something.. cuzz told me that she was criticizing (copy pasted the convo, hahahah, remember those days?) jin and my relationship. so this was when i started periodically ignoring nikki--still continues on. i don't think i ever really truly forgave her 'cause she gets on my nerves for no reason sometimes. well, plus, it could also just be how clingy she gets sometimes. hm. met katie tsai this year i think. we were pretty close, hung out a lot over the summer. LOTS. like, every day or every other day.

junior year was with james. we actually got together sometime in june, durga has pictures of me and him at the end of soph year. he asked me out officially.. on one knee.. on my doorstep.. with a white rose petal on his tongue. yea, i know you're all thinking "what the heeeeeeeeeeeeell? (haha, cuzz, your dad :P)" but.. yea. he said something about not being able to get me white roses or something so he had to get a petal. i duno. it was cute to me anyways. but yea. that 14 months was up and down.. ended in mid-august between junior-senior year. um.. junior year.. oh that was the michael liu story. and.. yea.. i was really close to katie tsai. then she left and got together with christian giang and basically didn't talk to me after that. well, we did have one drama moment but.. yea. i remember this being a stressful year and almost relapsing into depression--when james left over the winter, i got really really depressed.. and i think that's why i turned to michael liu. anyway. yea. oh! this was when i joined band and had a crush on the pit instructor :P arturo pacheco. hahha. yea that was a fun band year. :)

senior year.. yayuh :) girls! fab five :) hahah. that was fun. i was still getting over james--took almost an entire year i think. lots of good and bad things. hating esha. well. yea. okay. :P and i don't think i have any more random stories from that year..




yes! my life. ahaha. any questions, just leave a comment and i shall.. uh.. respond. :)

lovelove x0xo